…by someone named “The Food Lady” but she stopped blogging like a month ago for some reason.”
*waves* Hello! Remember me? I know some of you remember me, because at Nationals last weekend I had no fewer than three different incidents of perfect strangers walking up to me and saying “Hey, aren’t you The Food Lady? I read your blog!” This made me feel guilty, because there has been no blog to read since early July. Worst (extremely) minor dog-related celebrity EVER.
I have had a real busy month!! Between clients, shooting trials, competing and the extreme heat and weird orange haze that hangs over us all here due to the history-making apocalyptic wildfires that are consuming my province, not to mention my Very Angry elbow, opportunities to take photos of my motley crew are few and far between.
So let’s get down to business and I’ll tell you what’s been happenin’ ’round these parts.
My Springalingaling went to the AAC Nationals and did WAY better than I could ever have imagined! As you all know, Spring and the venue Thunderbird are not good friends. For the past several years, Spring has “eliminated” in the ring due to some unknown stressor that causes her to fear Thunderbird in all its white sand glory. So when we went to Regionals this year, our goals were simple and minimal:
– eat lots of cheese
– have lots of fun
We were successful in both of these endeavors, and even though Spring did not hit a single contact or get a single clean run all weekend, she was pretty happy to be there, did not befoul any of the rings, and managed to qualify for Nationals. On the basis of this success, our goals for Nationals, though still simple, were:
– eat lots of cheese
– have lots of fun
– try to hit at least some contacts
And once again, my happy, narrow little doggie pulled through! She ate all the cheese. She was having a good time out there. She hit EVERY SINGLE CONTACT and she managed to pull out three clean runs out of six. She had one bobble at the weave poles in Standard 1 and I sent her off course into the wrong tunnel mouth in Jumpers 2 (totally my bad) and in Gamblers 2, which she absolutely could have run clean, in the closing I was too tired from the heat and smoke and early mornings/long days and accidentally sent her over an off course jump. Again, totally my bad.
BUT let’s recap – my nervous little doggie found her Brave and ran at Nationals, despite her multi-year phobia of Thunderbird and despite the fact that since the Sadist stopped teaching we have had no opportunity to train since essentially November of last year. And despite the air quality index being somewhere between stuck-in-a-coal-mine and trying-to-breathe-on-the-surface-of-the-sun. I suck, my dog is awesome. Cheese is god. And Spring even managed to pull out a podium placement in her Standard 2. Even Tweed, winner of Regionals, never managed a podium placement at a Nationals! And to top off what was already an amazing weekend for me, she won an award for the Top Rescue Dog in the Regular division.
I’m literally the proudest of her I have ever been. NOT because she won things (although I *do* enjoy winning things) but because she had such a good time and was so willing to work for me despite all our challenges. So I took this shitty photo of her with her ribbon.
Such a good girlie!
This is NOT a good girlie. Her tally for August is: one baby duck eaten, one baby chicken eaten, one homicide with her partner-in-crime Winter perpetrated against an innocent adult duck. Of course she is happy about it though. She’s an asshole.
All my precious babybabies went back to the rescue headquarters to be neutered and head off to their new homes. I miss them so much!
Although I will apparently always have the “eau de puppy pee” odor to remember them by. I took everything out of the dog room this week, scrubbed the whole thing down with the steam mop (parbroiling my arm in the process. F*ck did that ever hurt!) and liberal vinegar, but still the stink lingers. Any suggestions for a good, safe odor remover?
We had a houseguest for a little while who got off to a rocky start by jumping out of the car and immediately killing a chicken and putting holes in my beloved turkey Terrence. We spent the next few days making use of a long line and reminders that killing my poultry is wrong (Addy and Winter have, obviously, still not grasped this concept) and by the end of her stay, she was pretty reliable about following the No Murders On My Property rule. Peetie, in her innocence, thought the houseguest was wonderfully fun.
Alfie is still with me, until October. I love him so much. I DO NOT WANT TO GIVE HIM BACK. Would it be wrong to flee the country with him tucked into my backpack?
July was full of photo shoots of other people’s doggies, which makes me so happy, because I love doing doggie photo shoots so very much. Also I like paying my rent :)
This is Stanley and Brunswick, who are besties, as you can see by the way THEY ARE HOLDING PAWS (and no, I did not pose them this way, they did it themselves!)
This is Malcolm and Lila who henceforth shall be referred to only as The Goobers.
This is Texas The Tripod, whom you’ve seen before in my composite, but I love this photo so much I needed to share it.
This is Mia and Kasper, who are so photogenic that I couldn’t pick just one photo to share, so you have to look at two different ones.
(yes they are on railway tracks. no you shouldn’t lecture me on the perils of shooting on railways tracks)
(yes they are standing in a boat that does not belong to me. no you shouldn’t lecture me on using someone else’s boat)
This is Robbie, who is crazy-for-tennis-balls!
I have 4 or 5 more shoots lined up for this month, but would love to have more, so feel free to contact me if you want to do a session!
Everything else is 100% normal around here. Piper is back to her old self, absolutely and completely. No more wobbles, no more head tilt, hiking three times a week. She is a remarkable fighter! Not even phased by bears (slash-totally-oblivious-to-the-bear)!
And now for the ultimate in OH MY GOD photos …. but first! Some kind of blogging law says I am required to advise you all that in exchange for my testimony I received this product free as compensation. But let me tell you that I would rave about it anyway because JUST LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT!!!
Is this not the most awesome thing you have ever seen?? EVER???
Susannah of Crochet Critter Craft made this for me in the likeness of His Orangeness, Mr. Woo. It’s a drink holder, though it has never held a drink around here because I keep putting it next to Mr. Woo, laughing until I cry, and photographing it. It is one of the most awesome things I have ever received in my life! IT LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE HIM!! You need one of these in your life, and then you need to take photos of it with its breathing likeness, and then you need to send me photos of that. So go to her shop on Etsy and buy one immediately!
I mean COME ON!!!
And you know, I am always happy to help promote the products of your creativity (except porn. Peetie has gone into heat again and I see enough humping every day that I really don’t need to see any more) so if you have something you want featured in my blog (and I promise to blog more often than once a month!) feel free to contact me! I love to help people promote their awesomeness, so don’t ever be shy about asking!
And now me, Captain Orange and 11 of our closest friends are heading out for an afternoon hike :)