• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content

Wootube!

Dolittle's got nothin' on me

  • Blog
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Links ‘n Stuff

Jenn and Luna

Let It Go, Let It Go, Let It Go

December 17, 2016 By The Food Lady 35 Comments

Are you ready for a huge dump of snow …. photos?

I did promise on Monday that I would take some pictures in the snow before it melted, it snows so rarely here, so I took some time out from editing Christmas photos on Monday afternoon to go out and play in the snow with the doggies and the camera.  Good thing too, because IT DIDN’T MELT AND IT’S ALL STILL HERE.  And we’re getting another load tonight!  Gah.

It’s been hovering between -5C and -10C here even in the daytime, which is basically unheard of for the Lower Mainland.  My pipes froze, and I had no water for 5 of the last 7 days, which is no fun when it’s flippin’ cold in the house and out of the house and your dogs eat cold semi-frozen food.  But weirdly, though the world is frozen solid, there is a new FLOWING river that has appeared from under my house and meanders lazily through the yard and out the back gate (that’s going to be extra awesome when the world thaws out).  This is the ONLY thing about the cold that makes the ducks happy; everything else about it makes them sad quackers.  I had to go out and buy three bales of hay to spread out around their yard, as their feet were freezing and they couldn’t walk.

The dogs are loving the snow though!

Well … not ALL of the dogs.  Addy doesn’t enjoy the snow or the cold one tiny bit, no matter how many sweaters and coats she’s wearing.

Often she doesn’t last more than 5 minutes, and ends up back in the house chewing on lamb necks with Gemma “I don’t go outside” Old Lady Dog.  She has practically no hair, so you can’t really blame her for this aversion to sub zero temperatures.

Everyone else is quite a lot hairier, and therefore quite a lot happier.

They have really been having so much fun, even if we only last about 40 minutes before I can’t feel my toes and we need to come back inside (I was built for warmer climes).

It puts them all in a fantastically silly mood.  This makes Peetie, who is the world’s naughtiest dog but all the world’s most playful dog, beyond happy because just about anyone will play with her in the snowy weather.  She’s over the moon.

But although she is a free-for-all player-with-other-dogs-er, her heart belongs to Dexter, and his to her.  They are besties furever.  Every day they have an hour long game of Bitey Face after breakfast, and as I type, they are laying on the sofa together passing a chewy toy back and forth.  I’ve never seen Dexter make a friend he likes as much as The Peetie Pocket.  They’re in lurrrrve.

This is specially excellent for Dexter now, at this time in his life, because two weeks ago he ruptured his ACL.  (Which in retrospect, and ironically, probably has something to do with his BFF Peetie, who is an unapologetic heel-biter).  I have been trying to limit his exercise somewhat, but obviously have not been all that successful, especially in the snow.

But as he won’t be able to play agility again, it pleases me that he has another thing to amuse him (ie Peetie).  He, of course, has no idea that anything is wrong with him and a limp sure doesn’t hold him back.

I’m sick to death of torn cruciates :(

YOU’RE sick of torn cruciates?

I’m glad that I got to take these awesome snowy photos on this property though, because I will never have this opportunity again.

So let me explain.

Around this time last year, me and my whole team of excellent, dedicated animal shelter workers were removed from our jobs, as many of you know.  It took me several months of decompressing to realize what a horrible, depressing effect that job had on me because of the horrible things I saw and the horrible people I dealt with day in and day out; my team was great, but management was poisonous, and the public was nearly as bad.  I now know that I don’t want to do this kind of work anymore; that after nearly 6 years of seeing people do terrible things to animals (and to other people) I don’t want that sort of negativity to be my bread and butter.  But I really didn’t, and don’t, know what I *want* to do.  I job hunted throughout the spring and summer and explored several industries through countless interviews and still couldn’t find something that spoke to me.  I had kind of resigned myself to taking just whatever to pay the bills (which was proving difficult enough to find in and of itself, because the job market here sucks and the payscales are pretty terrible), when I realized I’d miscalculated my unemployment benefits end-date, and ran out of money.  This happened at roughly the same time as my landlords put the farm, my home, up for sale and were feeling really positive that it was going to sell quickly.  What this turned into was an accumulation of awfulness – losing my job, losing Little Man, losing my home – and I really just fell out of the bottom of a spiraling hole of terribleness.  I couldn’t be positive, I couldn’t really see my way out of how sad I was about everything.  (And of course, cockroaches love the dark, and take advantage of this sort of environment to try and make you feel worse and post stupid, vile crap on your blog in a bullying attempt to rally everyone else to be nasty right along with them.  And that cockroach should be ashamed of herself).

I’ve always had very little patience or empathy for people who give up their pets because they’re ‘moving.’  “I’d live in my car with my dogs before I’d give them up” – I’ve said, you’ve said it probably, we’ve all heard it said.  And I believed it too.  But when I thought I was going to be broke and homeless I realized what a selfish thing it was for me to do to my dogs, to be unable to give them any kind of stability or life, living in my van while I couch surfed.  And I thought the best thing to do for my dogs, who are my family, and my life, was to find them homes better able to give them the kind of lives it looked like I wasn’t going to be able to give them any longer.  I felt I owed them that.  And that’s why I began the painful process of finding them new homes.

Then I was lucky and blessed enough to get some help from some friends, which got me through a scary financial time (and thank you to those wonderful people) and miraculously, I got a job.  It didn’t pay great, and I wasn’t at all interested in the industry or the position itself, but I needed something to climb out of the dark place; a buffer between me and the worst of the bad.  And the job turned out to be so awful and demeaning and boring – by the third day, when my alarm went off in the morning, I began to cry.  I just imagined the rest of my life stretching out into an awful, endless landscape of getting up before dawn to commute to a place where the entire staff was miserable and unhappy, spend the majority of my waking hours in that depressing place doing the world’s most mindless and boring job, and being condescended to by a woman half my age, and coming home to my dogs too tired and heartsick to appreciate them, and I couldn’t bear it.  It did not pull me out of the dark place, it sucked me right back in.

I decided I needed to make a change in my life, to do something every day that I enjoyed, and to work for myself.  I quite the job.  I took out a loan from a friend, to outfit myself as a commercial dogwalker.  After all, who else has more experience at walking 10 dogs at a time other than me? ;-)  The loan provided the money to build and host the website (please tell your friends in my area!), the business logo (by Canid Design, highly recommend her!), the business license/registration and aluminum crates in my van (and though I love that literally _none_ of you asked, there’s the explanation for that particular accusation) for the safest means of travelling with other people’s dogs, because I take that responsibility seriously.  I was excited to get started, the plan being that I would work hard for the next several years, do two group walks a day (each with half of my dogs and half of client dogs) leaving my evenings free of canine obligations to finish my university degree online.  And take it from there.  The farm wasn’t selling.  I was jazzed, I was motivated, and in the meantime, I was doing what I love most in the world, taking and editing photos of other people’s dogs (for Christmas!).  And because these last few paragraphs have been kind of depressing, here are some holiday photos to cheer us all up.

And then Dexter tore his cruciate, and I don’t have the money to fix that, and I was sorta bummed about it because he’s so young and active, but I’ve been through this before, and had some ideas about some photos shoots I want to do and sell prints and thought maybe I could eventually raise the money to fix it.  And then it snowed and my pipes froze, and Peetie ate the cord for my brand new Christmas gift of a heating blanket and the battery on my van died and had to be replaced to the tune of $300.00  … and my landlords told me that they sold the farm, the new owners don’t plan to rent out the houses, and I have to find somewhere to live by the end of February :(

I admit my relationship with the farm has changed somewhat since the incident with the coyote.  I’m a bit scared of the property now, and it’s no longer quite the paradise it used to be for me.  The magical river that has appeared in my yard, the frozen pipes, the curtains frozen to my window in the morning … I’m tired of sleeping in a bunk bed and wish for a real bedroom, some closets to store things, a gate that shuts properly.  But for all that, this has been my home for 7 years.  When I moved here they told me they would never sell their farm, it’s been in their family for generations.  It’s their home.  It’s my home.  I’m losing my home.

I’m trying really hard to maintain my happy vibe, but it’s awfully, awfully hard.  I feel a bit like there’s something horrible or just shitty with my name on it lurking around every corner just waiting to pound on every upwardly mobile step I manage to make.  Now I’m wondering where the hell I’m going to live with 10 dogs, in a place that has a housing crisis of epic proportions, that is affordable, when I have no job to recommend me.  How do I build a business in this area if I end up having to move hours away just to find affordable small acreage that will take my dogs?  What if I can’t find anywhere to go?  What’s going to happen to me and my dogs?  How did I get here, and how do I find my way out?

I could use some words of inspiration, or hope or hell, just plain old kindness. right about now.  I’m feeling kinda blue :(  And if I can have a Christmas wish granted this year, while it would be smart to wish for a new home for me and the dogs, I’m more tempted to wish that people stop being assholes.  At the risk of sounding trite, you really never know how difficult something is for someone else, and you never really know when that difficulty could be your difficulty.  I *never* thought I’d be in this position.  Try not being an asshole – this does not apply to 99.99% of the people who read my silly dog blog, but the reminder never hurts.

I hope the rest of you have a Merry Christmas.  And if anyone has a brilliant idea about where I could live and keep my family together, please PLEASE share it with me.  I would be ever so grateful.

Filed Under: Nowhere Particular Tagged With: Addy, big air photography, Dexter, Fae, farm, Jenn and Luna, mad teeth, Mr. Woo, Piper, Spring, TWooie, Winter

Victory Chicken!!

July 20, 2011 By The Food Lady 20 Comments

Yeah okay, not really.  My bantam hen flew the coop this morning (literally) and I happened to have my camera with me when I caught her to put her back.  I promise, the rest of this post is chicken-free.

Actually, I just popped in to tell those of you who are not Wootube fans on Facebook that Dexter is going to be in his first real agility trial this weekend!  After much (incessant, annoying, grating, mind numbing) nagging from Auntie Fiona about trialing him, I finally smugly told her that if The Sadist recommended it, I would enter him.  I was sure the Sadist would say “absolutely not, he’s just a baby dog, don’t put pressure on him, yaddayadda*somethingGerman*add an insult here*” but to my horror, he said he agreed it was time to get him out there and start exposing him to trial environments.  I swear Fiona did a little dance.

Can I bring my frisbee?

One of my favourite trials of the year happens to take place this weekend, so I threw Dex in just a couple of runs on Saturday.  It was super last minute, and totally unplanned, so you can also imagine my surprise when I learned afterward that a whole schwack of baby dogs are making their trial debut this weekend as well!  Total coincidence.  We’ll be trialing with Dex’s sister Ginny, and Pan the Malinois, and Billy the mini Aussie, and Lollipop the pitbull, and Wallace and Jack the poodles, and Curry the Kelpie … it’s amazing, ALL these dogs are making their trial debuts!  We’ll be in good company stumbling around out there trying to control our insane, ramped up puppies ;-)  I think they should rename the trial The March Of Virgins.

Hell, while I’m there, maybe I should throw Spring in too. She can do the tunnel:

and she can jump too!

As you can see by the look of indifference on TWooie’s face, he is unimpressed with Spring’s little accomplishments.

After all, he too can perform the tunnel:

and he can also jump!

But while he may not be impressed with her mad agility skillz, he is nevertheless charmed by her very being.  He’s played with her two more times this week and I even managed to photograph proof for you this morning!

I’ma gonna eatchoo!

I’ma gonna eatchoo AND Piper too!

I still can’t believe TWooie made a friend.

And if anyone asks me why I named her Spring, I’m just going to show them this photo:

Wish us luck this weekend! I’ll try to get someone to video it for us all :)

Filed Under: Nowhere Particular Tagged With: agility, big air, Dexter, Jenn and Luna, mad teeth, Piper, rescue dogs, TWooie

Fish Heads, Fish Heads, Roly Poly Fish Heads

December 6, 2010 By The Food Lady 10 Comments

d-1-16

There were so many good potential titles for today’s post.  The “fish heads” song was one of a handful available to me!  But because the fish head caused the most strife, it won.

Something clearly plucked this REALLY UGLY fish out of my river and ate everything but the head.  So Dexter, being the honorable fella that he is, stepped up to finish the job.  Alas, while he may be honourable, he’s also easily distracted, so at one point he got tired of carrying the fish head around and put it down.  TWooie licked it.  ONCE.  In the Land Of TWoo, that makes it his property.  So when Dexter went to pick up the head again, TWooie beat 10 kinds of holy hell out of him. I didn’t photograph this, because I had to step in to stop it.  There’s no TWoo as angry as A TWoo with a fish head that is coveted by another.

Another potential title for today was “The Icebreaker” because that’s what Jenn spent the whole walk doing.
d-1-21

Auntie Robyn came by to give me her treadmill (hey, I gotta be able to keep up with Dexter on the agility course  – time to start running again!) now that she’s given up on modern civilization and moved into a fishing shack in the woods.  She brought Jenn and Luna for a walk, and one of Jenn’s favourite games is to jump up in the air and STOMP on the ice with her front feet to break it.  I have no idea why people think border collies are weird, incidentally.

This kind of effort requires what we call “Serious Tongue.”
d-1-14

Flying Paws of JennBenn!
d-1-13

Another title for this post could have been “Why Dogs Have Claws.”  Wootie demonstrates:
d-1-20

He made it safely across by digging in with his nails.

Dexter made it safely across by using a stick for balance, like a tightrope walker.
d-1-19

Tweed tried to clear the entire little frozen lake by leaping across it.  And failed.
d-1-17

Fantabulous ice breaker!  Jenn was jealous.

And TWoo was just plain old unimpressed, and tried to steal Robyn’s boots.
d-1-18

And that was the sum total of my day off.

But lest we forget … another shameless plug for Santa Photos in Maple Ridge this coming Sunday!
santapics

See you there!!  You can meet the infamous 3WaaW gang!

You totally want to meet me.  And bring me cookies.
d-1-23

Filed Under: Nowhere Particular Tagged With: big air photography, Dexter, farm, Jenn and Luna, Mr. Woo, Tweed, TWooie

Why so crabby, TWooie?

June 4, 2010 By The Food Lady 45 Comments

wrb-1-31

Yesterday the sun came out for the WHOLE DAY.  Lucky us!! We went to the beach with sister Ginny, and cousins Jenn and Luna.  In a fit of either optimism or false confidence, I decided to bring TWooie along as well.  East Beach is huge, so it is easy to avoid strange dogs when necessary (which is always, with TWooie) but I hoped that since TWoo has met all these dogs before, he’d be relatively well behaved.

Except for one incident with Luna, he managed to restrain himself reasonably well.

If this were that portly little meatball, I’d shake him to death just like this!
wrb-1-44

Personally, I think TWooie was just so confused by the mass of writhing, racing, tumbling border collies that he couldn’t tell them apart and decided it was safer to pretend he liked them all than risk fighting with one he knows and he likes.  But whatever works!  We had two lovely hours of playtime, and TWooie didn’t try to kill anyone.

Well, except for this crab.

Crab: I find myself singularly unimpressed with the situation I seem to be in currently.
wrb-1-22

In my short time with the TWoo, I have learned there is really nothing at all in the world he will not eat, if he suspects at all that it is edible.

Fresh seafood?  Why not?

Approach:
wrb-1-17

Taste test:
wrb-1-19

Momentary retreat:
wrb-1-18

The crab was not going down without a fight.

Come ‘ere, you.  I intend to eat you.
wrb-1-14

Crab:  Eff that, pal.
wrb-1-15

He discussed the problem with his brother, who tried to resolve the dispute, bot got pinched in the tongue and gave up quickly.
wrb-1-27

Crab:  That’s right, assholes.  And there’s more where that came from!
wrb-1-30

Crab:  Bring it on, meatball!!
wrb-1-11

Crab:  Put me down, you freak!

TWoo:  Ow ow ow.  Stop pinching me.
wrb-1-21

But in the end, TWooie bested the crab.
wrb-1-13

And, as is typical for the TWoo, once he had secured the crab in his mouth, he ran away to bury it.  Which is exactly what the crab wanted, and was trying to do to itself when TWooie found it in the first place.  I didn’t know crabs bury themselves to hide themselves, and now I wonder how many cabs I have unknowingly stepped on whilst at the beach.

Surprisingly, Twooie never hurt the crab at all – he was very gentle when picking it up and carrying it around.  But I figured that, photo ops not withstanding, it was probably unpleasant for Mr. Crab to be carried around like that, so I liberated it and Auntie Cathie distracted TWooie with cookies, which he liked better because they don’t fight back.

Cookies you say?  WAY better than crab legs.  ONMYWAY!!!
wrb-1

TWooie: more fun than all the other dogs combined.

Dexter had a super time at the beach as well.  He LOVES his sister Ginny so very much.  And I realized yesterday as well that he seems to have mostly outgrown his assholiness with other puppies.  Even when this little dreamboat came strolling over:
wrb-1-32

He was very friendly to her.  And really, he would’ve been justified in killing her just because she is a thousand times cuter than he is.  Seriously – Papillon puppies are adorable.
wrb-1-33

His only real concern was that his sister Ginny seems to share his toy hoarding tendencies: unlike the other dogs, who get a toy and bring it to some human foot and drop  it for it to be thrown again, the Peanut family seems to be obsessed with getting a toy and keeping that toy at all costs.  Which means that she was competition for any toy in play.

Shit.   There she is again.
wrb-1-8

Maybe if I just freeze here she won’t notice me.
wrb-1-4

But what goes around, comes around.

Uh oh.  He’s looking at my Wootie Toy™.
wrb-1-42

And everyone was obsessed with Jenn, who vomits up toys at random intervals.
wrb-1-52

I notice that in the comments, several of you have commented on what appears to be Wootie’s slimmed-down physique.  It’s true – Wootie has lost his hibernating winter weight and is once again trim and lithe.
wrb-1-50

He, TWooie and Tweed have all been on a diet and it’s working very well, although like all Aussies everywhere, the three of them are convinced they are being starved to death.

It was a very fun day and lifted my spirits considerably!  I felt kind of like this:
wrb-1-23

And not just because of the sun, and the beach, and the good company.  I have an even better reason for my improved frame of mind.

I can haz be agility champion, plz?
bby-1-57

Even after two hours of playing Dumbball at the beach, Tweed went to agility class last night and played for the full hour, and he ROCKED it.  He limped almost not at all, he was fast and responsive and by golly, he even won the final timed round by a full second – he beat all the other dogs in both classes.  And this morning, he is 100% A-OKAY.

Regionals, here we come!  Woot!

Filed Under: Nowhere Particular Tagged With: agility, dog beach, Jenn and Luna, Mr. Woo, Tweed, TWooie, wildlife

Holy Cow!

March 28, 2009 By The Food Lady Leave a Comment

Tah-DAH!

Sorry.

Today we went to Dog Heaven in Ladner. With 10 border collies. That’s right, you heard me. TEN. And for the first time ever, I didn’t have the majority percentage! Today my foster home Hilary had us all beat with Cracker, Bo, Penny, Chance and Gracie.

Bo was adopted from TDBCR. He came with his own stick.

And he will get all up in yo bizness until you throw it for him.

Even if Penny harasses him about his obsession.

Penny was also adopted from TDBCR. She is lovely.

Tweed was miffed that she usurped his status as The Red Dog Present, and snubbed her.

But Piper slapped some sense into him.

“Manners, big oaf!”
“Hey, step off, beeyotch!”

Hilary also brought TDBCR foster Gracie, who I managed somehow to not take a single photograph of. Gracie is staying with Hilary for a week until she goes off to her forever home – she managed to get adopted before she was even available!

She also is fostering my favourite TDBCR rescue boy, Chance, the fella from Grand Forks I picked up last month.

Isn’t he handsome by halves though? Such soulful eyes.

Such a sexy physique

And talented? Whew! He even did some Vaudville for us!

yah-dadadada-dah…

Jenn, Miss ME-ME-ME, was not impressed with all the attention Mr. Mad Skillz was getting.

Get out of my limelight, jerk!

Chance is now ready for a forever home of his very own. Tell your friends! He’s an absolute delight.

Am I doing a good job of selling this handsome devil??

***I interrupt these photo captions to ask you all a Very Important Question***

Why does Jenn torment Piper? I have owned border collies for many years, and it is my experience that frequently one will obsess over another. Briggs used to obsess over my older-than-him border collie Abi. Whatever she did do, he done did as well. Mr. Woo spends half his time pouncing on Piper. Sport went everywhere Tweed went.

But this is different. Jenn does not live with Piper, and she doesn’t want to do what Piper does – she wants to TORMENT her. She seems, actually, hell bent on driving Piper into a frothing, raging psychosis.

TEN dogs with us today, folks. TEN. And Jenn engaged in exactly one activity the entire time. I have no photos of it, but it goes like this:

*Ahem. Jenn Impression*

Look Piper, I have a stick. A stick. You want the stick don’t you? You want it. You totally want it. Come and get it. Get the stick. Here, I’m putting it on the ground and walking away from it. Just walking awa-HAH YOU IDIOT! YOU FELL FOR IT! YOU CAN’T HAVE THE STICK!! The stick is mine! But you want it, don’t you? What are you so mad about? What if I poke you with it? Like this. Hey? Hey? Do you like that? What if I dance with it? Does that bug you? Do you want it? Want the stick? I know you want it. Come get the stick. What are you, some kind of pussy? Oh you’re mad now, are you? HAHAHA that’s funny! Come here and say that to my face! Come here and say it to my face, and get the stick. This stick. This stick right here. Come on, I dare you.

*RAGE*

At one point, while Piper was standing still trying veryveryvery hard to ignore Jenn, Jenn snuck up behind her and BIT HER IN THE ASS. Srsly!!

I’ve seen nowt like it. Have you?

What? I’m not doing anything. *blink*

Piper was ready to throw herself under a train.

Mr. Woo, on the other hand, was just plain excited to see Auntie Robyn.

BONZAI!

Until he saw the eagles.

I think he ate one.

It’s thirsty work, eating all the eagles.

Does the thought of 10 border collies make you tired? How about 7?

It exhausts me!

I’m thinking hamburgers for dinner. How about you?

Tune in next week, when Donutz will show us all how to make Pan Fried Hamster Snackz!

Say a little prayer for MC Hamster ;-)

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Donut, Jenn and Luna, mad teeth, meat, Mr. Woo, Piper, Tweed

If Gandalf Humped A Mop*

March 22, 2009 By The Food Lady Leave a Comment

The result would be Wootie’s new boyfriend.
Work your magic on me baby

Oh you made me levitate! Good work, GandalfMop!

Now he has the courage to take on Mad Teeth(tm)!

Except … they ARE rather frightening

It may be time to retreat

Even scarier than the Original Mad Teeth(tm) are the miniature version.

Mostly because they bite. They especially bite their large, fuzzier doppelganger.

Do not chase me.

I WILL rip your beard off, doppelganger!

NINJA MINI MAD TEETH CAN LIFT 6 TIMES HER OWN WEIGHT!

You have to feel sort of sorry for wee Harriet, because *everyone* chases her. Everyone big, that is.

But no worries! Parker The Super Greyhound is rushing to her little sister’s rescue!

I (and my FABULOUS ass) am coming, Harry!

The rescue was going well, until … Parker met her nemisis (cue ominous music).

It was … AVIS.

Oh sure, she looks cute and innocent right? But Avis, as her mum says, maintains a “B(itch) Plus Average.” She kicked the hell out of poor Parker.

Parker tried to run her out of town

But only one emerged victorious

In fact, the only dogperson Avis did not try to take on was Jenn. Because Jenn is scary.

Just ask Tweed.

I am coming for you Tweed. You will not know when, you will not know how … but I WILL annihilate you

Run away! Run away!

The Matriarch, Luna, observed the others with weary disdain.

Oh foolish youth.

It’s such hard work, being so awesome and wise. Also, it was pretty windy.

Mr. Woo soon grew tired (don’t ask me how, it’s not as though he actually did anything resembling exercise today) and was dreaming …

… about how he could get his own fluffy Aussie cloud flotation device

Pretty soon Parker was down for the count too. She took a break … as did Robyn. Weird.

The border collies, however, took no prisoners.

Well, except Jackie and her Chuck-It.

THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!

Until it was time to go…East. Parker said we should go East.


The best part about today’s outing … 3 totally zonked out, sandy, too-tired-to-move dogs! ZOMG! They only woke up long enough to eat dinner, and they are all asleep again.

*today’s title brought to you by Robyn, Jenn and Luna’s mum!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: dog beach, Jenn and Luna, mad teeth, Mr. Woo, Parker and Harriet, Piper, Tweed

Next Page »

[footer_backtotop]

Copyright © 2026 Sheena Staples · Site by Transmit Studio · Log in